LOCKED UP!!!

Hey. Wait. What's the camera doing up there??? Are you looking at my bald spot? Well, you don't exactly have to get THAT close to see it! My entire scalp is visible at some distance!

So sorry to have missed you folks for so very long, but you see, I have been locked up. I've been told that I am in custody for my own protection. I don't believe a word of it. I asked to see my lawyer, but that request has been repeatedly deflected as they continue to tell me that I am not under arrest. So why am I being held? Is it because I tried to pluck the outlet cover from the outlet? What I really want to know is WHERE'S THE WRIT OF HABEAS CORPUS???


Brother Manz and Sister Manz have been by to keep me company in the visiting area. There is some equipment for working out in the visiting yard, but I cannot see the point in the squeaking ladybug. Its smile makes me think it knows something.

Soon, my friends. Soon I shall be free from this unholy bondage, and then, oh then, I will broadcast again! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha!!!!! Oh no! The guard must have heard me. Oh no! He's going to...

GET ME!!!!!!!!

Baloney Again...

Aaaand, Action! Wait, that's not right...

Action! Hey there! Welcome to the Mr. Manz Show! For this, our historic THIRD ONLINE EPISODE, we have a very special treat for you! Tonight we introduce you to two of our favorite contributors here at the Mr. Manz Show, Sister Manz and Brother Manz. Take it away, Sister Manz...

Hello. My name is Sister Manz. I am deeply concerned with women's rights, human rights and wildlife preservation. I am planning on being an oceanographer, and I hope to find ways to change the pattern of poisoned rain shed polluting the oceans. (What's that, Mr. Manz. What do you mean 'I sound like a half-stunned beauty contestant.' I thought you wanted me to introduce myself. This is who I am! FINE!!!)

It's our historic THIRD ONLINE EPISODE!!!! I'm CRAAAAAAAAAAAAZY! Let's all dance!



Ooookay, then. And now over to Brother Manz. Wait, Brother Manz is driving to a story, even as we speak. He is researching the phenomenon of Mario-Cart-Induced-Tourette's Syndrome. Apparently, whenever Daddy Manz plays Mario Cart, strange, half-formed sounds that can't be polite burst from his throat.

(What's that? We don't have mobile camera crews? So where is Brother Manz heading? To PLAY Mario Cart? Great. Just peachy.)

Brother Manz will be back with us eventually to give us a first-hand report on the side effects of excessive Mario Cart play.

So that's the show for tonight. Thanks for joining us for this, our historic THIRD ONLINE EPISODE and be sure to come back for our next episode, Cats: Wonderful Companions or Just a Snack?


*camera clicks off*

An Apple a Day Would Be Nice...

Now what does that flashing light mean again? Wait. We're on? Again? Blast! One of these days I'll get it right. Uh-hem.

Welcome back! Things have been very up in the air here at the Mr. Manz show. Brother Manz and I appear to have caught a cold. I keep trying to let it go, but it refuses to leave.

Sister Manz is with another relative to try to avoid catching it. I miss her very much and hope to see her very, very soon. Sister Manz, we're thinking of you wherever you are. And, as soon as you get back, we promise to pull your hair, you mean ol' twit, for leaving us here to be ill. Oh, and I played with your pony.

Mama Manz is telling me to conserve my voice. Personally, I think she is trying to conserve her fingers as she tries to keep up with the running transcript. Come on, Mama Manz, suffer for art: MY art.

But now I'm off for my night life.

Take care, stay safe, and I'll be seeing you all soon. Well, YOU'LL be seeing ME soon. Have a good night.

(Hey, Brother Manz! Have you identified which dock that shipment of Joker Nerve Gas is supposed to be unloading at yet? Wait... Oh no! Get those cameras off me, already! Do you want to give away my secret identity!)

Hi Everybody!

Are we ready to go on yet? What, the cameras are rolling? Tell me these things, people! How much of a goober do I look! I mean, um, er...

Hi! I'm Mr. Manz of the Mr. Manz Show, coming at you straight from my livingroom. As this is the first internet broadcast for us, let me tell you a bit about myself and about the show.

I am Tyrannosaurus Manz. I live in central Oklahoma with my father, Daddy Manz, my mother, Mama Manz, my brother, Brother Manz, and my sister, Sister Manz. They're a strange family, but it's the one I have, and I like them. They seem to like me, too, since they give me a warm bed in which to sleep and good food to eat. They provide me with toys, cats and dogs with which to play. And they do attempt to keep me clean and dressed (granted, I prefer dirty with no pants and one sock, but Mama Manz has no sense of style).

In upcoming episodes, I'll introduce each member of the family, and perhaps convince them to do a little broadcast of their very own.

Well, we're out of time for tonight, folks. Later this week, a discussion of MCIT (that's Mario-Cart-Induced-Tourette's), a visit from the Brother Manz who will tell us his story of the letter from the Tooth Fairy, an update on the world's oceans from Sister Manz, and a bit of cat-watching in the kitchen and elsewhere. Please send your email questions and comments to Tyrannomanz (at) yahoo dot com. Thanks for tuning in and goodnight.

Time to head out...
(mumblewumblemumble)

What do you mean the cameras are not off yet?! Can someone please get these little technical problems sorted out by our next broadcast? Yeesh!